Ladies: Be seen and not heard.

Now then..... i'm all in favour of women getting on in the world, once they've scrubbed the front doorstep, finished the ironing and tidied up, but they really seem to be taking liberties with us good natured gents. Why just the other day some woman decided to start sloshing petrol around the kitchen whilst cooking hubby's tea, and blow herself up!! This is what happens when the weaker sex try to multitask and over stretch themselves, instead of leaving all the technical stuff to the men.

Take coffee bean growing, menopausal nutcase Kristina Kirchner. A woman, who through bribery and corruption has managed to weedle her way to become President of a third rate Spanish outpost.

It's mouthy women like her that start mass brawls at the local ballrooms. If ever there was a case for women to go back to their traditional role of housewife, then she is it. Kirchner The Kleptomaniac is all over media like a re-occurring case of hemorrhoids at the present talking about ''colonial Britain'' and lots of other tosh, yet she seems to forget that it's her greasy Spanish ancestors that pitched up in South America, massacred the indigenous population and claimed it for themselves. People in glass houses eh...!

Just the other weekend i had a couple of evenings at the theatre to watch the ballet. Yes, i am that sophisticated!! Swan Lake and Romeo & Juliet just to be precise. The only fly in the oink'ment came on the 2nd night - in the form of two women sitting on my right side, who, throughout the performance constantly rustled sweetie papers and whispered odd bits of drivel into each others ears. Some people know nothing about etiquette and stuff. Anyway...annoying as this was, it was small fry compared to sitting at the intermission and listening to all their likes, dislikes, ailments and general hang-ups and emotional baggage that all women drag around for their entire lives and are only too willing to share with any unfortunate bystander.......... or theatre go-er!!! 

Now, i may have sciatica, a dodgy hip and a colostomy bag, but when the house lights came up at the end of the performance i literally bolted for the exit. A lucky escape if ever there was one. If a thick rope had of gone astray from the fly-tower i'd of absailed over the balcony. All those years of S.A.S training didn't go to waste. I've still got it .. i never lost it!

Juliet- played by Alevtina Lapshina.

So anyway, as i just mentioned, lucky me managed to get tickets for two shows by the best touring ballet company around at the moment: The Moscow City Ballet Company. And damn fine they were too. Obviously, star of the show was Prima Ballerina: Alevtina Lapshina. A woman whose 'fouettes' during Swan Lake and her annimated, silent screams of pain during Romeo & Juliet were easily worth the admission fee alone. Bravo!  

''Fouettes''

Performed by the world number one ballerina - Marianela Nunez.