Wednesday, 27 June 2012

Kicking The Bucket - Metaphorically And Quite Literally!



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It's been a funny month or so for famous person deaths. First of all the lovely Donna Summer passed away from lung cancer at the spritely age of 63. Shortly followed by disco legend Robin Gibb who died of cancer complications at the age of 62. Then only t'uther week Brian Hibbard, the lead singer of 80's pop harmony group The Flying Pickets dies from prostate cancer aged 65.

It's always a shame when people that are so well-liked and talented pass away. Even more so when you consider the current crop of karaoke rejects that seem to come and go like a reoccuring case of hemorrhoids!! Still, i guess it's not all bad news.  Alex Salmons number one fan; Lockerbie bomber Abdelbaset al-Megrahi finally took the hint, curled up and died at his home in Tripoli. I reckon if ever there was a reason why ''You Should be Dancin,'' - that must be it.


I taught the boy everything he knows!



It just goes to show you never know when your number is up and those Pearly Gates are swinging open. All the more reason to make sure that bucket list gets a damn good kicking whenever possible.


Even as someone in their twilight years my own bucket has taken a few hits recently. Global travel, my trip to Moscow and the world famous Bolshoi. A parachute jump was also crossed-off the list some time ago. Okay, so i needed a medical where they did everything except shine a torch up my rectum, but it was a price worth paying and in a rather perverse way i almost enjoyed it... As for the parachute jump, well, lets just say it's not the first time i've been suspended in a harness, and i'm hoping it won't be the last. Ooh Matron!!

If you've been paying attention earlier [ if not - why not? ] you'll know i have my Saga holiday to New York lined up immediately after Christmas. It's a bit of a long shot, but the possibility of seeing Central Park in the snow has always captured my imagination ever since i was a wee slip of a lad. Also, visiting the very beautiful St. Petersburg and the Mariinski Theatre are other items that will hopefully get struck'un off the list in 2012 - fingers crossed. Admittedly, a costly exercise for someone on a meagre state pension and disability allowance, but as they always say ''you can't it with you'' which is technically correct, although Robert Maxwell had a damn good try.


The Church On Spilled Blood in St. Petersburg. Lovely! 

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As always, at the end of each blog i dispense pearls of wisdom to you all in the form of my much sought after: 'wise words'. Keeping with the current theme, i leave you with this nugget of wisdom.

''NOW is the best time to be alive - so don't be bored''

Monday, 18 June 2012

Pulp Fact - Not Fiction.

Even as a military man with years of jungle training, encompassing hand-to-hand combat alongside Japanese ninja's, i still abhor violence of any kind. Well, unless it means seeing an MP get a damn good pasting inside the 'squared circle.'

Oh Yesss. Last week, ex-Cheeky Girl Lothario Lembit Opik thought it'd be a good idea to enter a tag-team wrestling match because he thought it was all staged. The result might be staged, but being throttled by an 18 stone guy certainly isn't. 


Lembit makes his wrestling debut at 02:55 secs.

The thing i find most disturbing about this whole episode is that Opik was previously elected as a Member of Parliament and had to make mildly important-ish decisions [he was a Lib Dem afterall] about the running of the UK. It would seem that Mr Opik, just like most MP's, suffers from a severe lack of judgement as not only did he try and out-wrestle a wrestler, but he also dumped sexy TV weather girl Sian Lloyd for a scrawny Cheeky Girl.

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As always, at the end of each blog i do the honour of imparting a small piece of my wisdom to you all. As many will already testify to: generosity to others has always been my achilles heel.

Today's ''wise words''...

Women are like sparklers - they should always be kept at arms length.